AFTER YOU LEAVE
It is important to remain mindful of your safety, even after you have left an abusive relationship.
- Many abusers resort to stalking during the relationship and after the relationship has ended. Learn about stalking and stalking victim safety here.
- Consider filing for a protective order, if you have not done so. You should speak to a victim advocate about this before hand. File it with your local police department and give a copy to your children’s teachers, babysitters or anyone who provides care for your children. Give a copy to your employer and an administrator at your college. Keep a copy on your person and in your car.
- Abusers have been known to steal mail from the homes of their victim’s relatives and friends. Keep this in mind when sending mail.
- Screen your calls. Do not answer calls marked “anonymous” or “private” or calls from numbers you do not recognize. Tell your children the same.
- Remind your children about the importance of privacy. Tell them not to give out any information to strangers asking for their family or personal information.
- Do not give any personal information to any telemarketers or anyone seeking to verify your identity and/or address over the phone.
- Save any messages, emails and/or letters from the abuser. Report it immediately, especially if they are in violation of a protective order.
- Be aware of your surroundings. Arm yourself with pepper-spray, self defense skills or some other form of protection you are comfortable with.
- Take a different route to work/school/running errands. Do not frequent the places you are known to go. Do not go to places your abuser is known to frequent.
- Consider counseling for yourself and your children.
Read the information on this site regarding safety in your new home or once the abuser has moved out.
We encourage victims to develop a safety plan with the assistance of a trained victim advocate. The safety measures on this site are not intended to be a guarantee of safety or a substitute for professional or legal counsel.
Your local coalition may also have some additional information on protecting yourself and your identity. The following organizations can also assist you:
The National Domestic Violence Helpline 800-799-SAFE (7233)
The National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline 866-331-9474
The National Sexual Assault Hotline 800-656-HOPE (4673)
ChildHelp National Child Abuse Hotline 800-4-A-CHILD (800-422-4453)